Just thought I would check in and update you all on life in my world….
I think I’m slowly but surely getting to grips with motherhood! I’m starting to learn the different cries (hunger/wet/tired etc). It’s taking me a while, but I think I’m getting there now. It’s a definite learning curve being a first time mum, but something I’m totally loving and wouldn’t change a thing. Even the sleep deprivation is getting easier to tolerate!
Jessica is doing really well, growing and developing rather quickly for my liking, but obviously that’s a good thing too! She’s becoming her own little character, gurgling and cooing away, it’s lovely. She’s getting more alert when she’s awake now, looking around, holding her head up, and smiling too. She’s my world, and I can’t describe how much I love having her in my life.
As far as our housing situation is concerned, we’re slowly but surely making progress there also. The payments towards our rent have been reinstated, and backdated, so some of the rent arrears has been cleared. Just the rest of it to sort out, and then we can start bidding on social housing. Fingers crossed.
Mental health wise, I’m a little unstable to be honest; I have quite a few ups and downs these days, I think mostly due to our situation with the housing. Once that’s resolved I’m hoping my mental health will settle again. I just keep getting there horrible flashes where I see us being made homeless with a baby. I honestly don’t know how we’d cope with that. I don’t think it’ll come to that though, at least I sincerely hope not!! But, to be facing homelessness for the second time this year, it’s going to take it’s toll. I’ve also lost my PIP money as well, because at the time of review, my mental health was stable and I was well, so they’ve deemed me as no longer eligible. I could perhaps appeal the decision, but in all honesty I don’t think it’ll get me very far. It’s a really difficult payment to get as it is, and when I compare my health now to my health back then when I originally applied and got awarded it, I can see why I’m not eligible now. Although my condition is so very unpredictable. Don’t get me wrong, I’m so so much better than I was right at the start of this blog. So I’m not really complaining, it’s just frustrating as that was a huge portion of our income. I am looking and applying for other things that we’re entitled to though, so hopefully it won’t make too much of an impact.
Anyway, will be time to feed and get to bed soon, so will call it a night on this now. Will update again as and when I can 🙂
Take care, stay strong and until next time….
x Sara Phoenix x