April 30th – CBT 12/12

Well hello folks, 

As the title suggests, today was session 12 of 12 on the CBT course; feels weird in a way, and like the end of an era. The biggest thing that I’ve gained from it is a sense of pride in myself. Even R agreed with that too, she said that despite my crazy rollercoaster ride and some really tough times, I still made it to every session without fail. She said that in itself is an amazing achievement. I am glad that I stuck with it and made it through all the sessions. Over time it’s started to make sense and I’m definitely seeing the validity of it. There was some weeks where I nearly didn’t go, or when I did and just sat there not taking any interest whatsoever in what was being said. But, despite all of that, I’ve learnt a lot. Not only about CBT methods, but also about myself. 

Sometimes I’ve had those niggling negative thoughts, but thanks to CBT I’ve learnt that just because I think them, it doesn’t make them fact. For example: The negative thought that I’m useless and fail at everything; My new thinking of this is that I’m not useless, and yes sometimes I fail at some things, but at least I’m trying. And I keep trying until I succeed.

So it’s proof that I’ve learnt something even without realising it. In 3 months we’ll be contacted for a review, and from there I can go on to 1-1 CBT if I still need/want to. They like you to have the 3 month break to take in all that we’ve learnt in group and try to put it into practise for ourselves. I think this is a good approach and although I first thought that I wanted to go straight onto the 1-1, I now believe the break will do me good as well. I can go back to the beginning of our course book and go through it all again, then when it comes to the review I can talk about what I understand and what I’d like to work more on.

My mood has been pretty good today overall; had a bit of a low point this afternoon, stressing about money and was really tired. I took a nap and it seemed to lift thankfully. Tomorrow I have to tackle some scary phone calls, so getting on top of my anxiety tomorrow is going to be my biggest task. But, it’s things that need to be done so I’ve got to face up to it and get it done.

Tomorrow is also May 1st and Mental Health Awareness day; It also signifies my ‘Themed/Topic’ blog post date too, so I’ll be working on that during the day tomorrow as well. I haven’t decided on a theme/topic yet, but I hope I can think of something worth writing about and do it justice!

I set up my medications on a rolling repeat prescription today, so that it gets done automatically every 28 days; it saves me having to worry about putting in my repeat request, and they’ll just text me when my medication is ready to collect. It’s always good to put in place things that’ll help long term. 

 

Anyway, I think that’s all I’ve got to say for tonight, so will leave it there. I hope this post finds everyone well! 

Until next time, I leave you with this positive quote: 

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